It's time to take a look back at just how brilliant I am when forecasting what will take place in the National Football League. Some of these were close. Some of these were just plain wrong. But a few of these predictions were just plain amazing. Enjoy my genius!!!
- Time to start with the topic that has burned me up the most all off season. Saints scandal? Nope. Tebow? Uh uh. Refs? Try again. Nothing has ticked me off more than every single talking head picking the Bills as the new team to beat in the AFC. Really? I can see it to a degree since the Dolphins and Jets are terrible, but there is no way they even approach being good enough to knock the Patriots off the stand and won’t even get a wild card. Their new, revamped, awesome defense…won’t be top 15. Bills…ha. CORRECT! They ranked 22nd in defense and never even looked like a contender. Why aren't those people who had them in the play-offs fired??
- Speaking of bad teams, I will cover a bad team and a bad player, my nemesis, Kevin Kolb. Guess what, my yearly (and correct) prediction he will suck…it is back. He will continue to get few starts and be terrible in what he gets. When a guy named Skelton is pushing a highly paid player out of the line up, you know it is time to quit. Kolb…ha. CORRECT! He had one good game the entire year and only a few starts. Kolb has been a blessing for predicting bad QB play.
- J-E-T-S! SUCK SUCK SUCK! Offense will be 25th overall or lower. CORRECT! #30, gotta love those Ryan boys.
- And Tebow…yeesh. He will start no more than 2 games and have no more than 5 passing TDs. The sad thing is that pathetic performance will still look good versus the Sanchize. CORRECT! Zeroes across the board.
- Now for some positive points. AD is a beast. Peterson will get back to form and while he won’t lead the league, he will hit 1,250 yards and 10 TDs. Kinda...I mean, a lot of people were saying he would miss most of the year and never play the same (but not in the good, "going to almost break the rushing number" way), but I undersold him on yards...by nearly half.
- Brett Favre…man this is bold…will stay retired. There is a lot of grass that needs mowing. CORRECT! Bold of me indeed.
- Chris Johnson restores a little bit of faith in his nickname. While he has a few 12 carries for 28 yard games, he also has a few monster games to get back to 1,350 yards with 250 receiving and 12 total TDs. Kinda...I was dead on with the 12 carries for 28 yards comment and was really, really close on the yardage (1243) and receiving yards (232), but only 4 TDs on the year means I can't give myself full credit.
- The Steelers all new and improved run-first philosophy will become a pass-first (and second and third) offense fairly quickly. No RBs over 850 yards. CORRECT! The run game was as sad as watching Charlie Batch scramble without a walker. Dwyer came closest...with only 623 yards.
- Brandon Marshall will return to form. You know, the form where he flakes out and does nothing. Another disappointing season for fantasy owners. WRONG! He let me down and while he did have a few off games, he also had some dominant games. And let's face it, if a Bears receiver finishes a game with more than 50 receiving yards, they had a huge day.
- Wilson will look good early for Seattle, then struggle in mediocrity but finish strong. Kinda...he looked good early and did finish strong, he just never truely struggled.
- Speaking of Seattle, their RB Turbin will score 10 TDs. WRONG! I thought he was going to be huge and he was, a huge dissappointment...zero TDs.
- Dolphins passing game won’t be great, but their run game will be worse, so by comparison passing will look decent. WRONG! Hard to grade this one out. On the one hand, Bush had 986 yards, Thomas another 325, which is not terrible, but Tannehill had a decent season with no WRs, 3200 yards passing.
- Josh Freeman continues his free fall at QB. Without anyone to turn to, he will finish the season. CORRECT! The Bucs started strong and then fell apart.
- Tom Brady continues to be Tom Brady…a balding super model with a shrew for a wife who throws the ball remarkably well. Stats similar to last year. CORRECT! Brady was very Brady. In his Uggs...pfffft.
- Kansas City is another hot pick to win their division and surprise everyone. No surprise here…cause they won’t. 8-8 or worse. CORRECT! Again, for all those talking heads who said KC WOULD make the play-offs and MIGHT make the Superbowl...you are all idiots and should yield your jobs to me.
- Lions take a step backward. No play-offs. Megatron still wows, but Stafford will turn the ball over more. CORRECT! Thank goodness the Lions will always be the Lions.
- Cleveland is a team in the National Football League. That is all that can be said. CORRECT! If they weren't purchased, they would not have even been mentioned this year.
- San Diego’s run game is still terrible after Matthews returns from injury to train for his next season ending injury. Rivers will have to continue slinging it. Kinda...Matthews had 707 yards...but didn't have a season ending injury.
- Real refs will be back by week 4 and there will be at least one major embarrassment/ruined game as a result. HOLY CRAP WAS THIS CORRECT!!!!! This was my best prediction since predicting the season-ending Brady injury a month before it happened a few years ago.
- Texans will have a good season and will likely win the division. But, expect a so-so season (10-6) and a Wild Card play-off loss. Kinda...They did win the division but made it out of the first round of the play-offs.
- Washington’s greatest weakness continues to be their horrible offensive line. I am sure they will fix it with their 1st round pick next year or the year after. WRONG! Rushing got them into the play-offs.
- RGIII will look good and is no doubt the future of the franchise. But, that line will limit him to under 3,000 yards passing and 450 yards rushing. WRONG! He did look good, but he also posted great numbers (3200, and 815).
- The variance in TDs to INTs for Carson Palmer will be around a plus/minus 4. WRONG! Really, that was wrong. Huh? Sure felt right, but he had 22 TDs and 14 INTs.
- His former team, however, will look good. Not play-off good, but Dalton will be the best looking second year starter in the NFL. Kinda...they made the play-offs.
- Aaron Rodgers will look just as impressive as he did last year, another Pro-bowl season. CORRECT!
- The Packers secondary will look as lost as they did last year, another depressing season. CORRECT!
- Falcons will have a balanced offense this season and a strong defense. Kinda...their defense was usually strong but they didn't get a lot out of Turner.
- Demarco Murray will lead the league in rushing, but not by much. WRONG! Oh well.
- Cedric Benson will top 1,000 yards, but not by much. WRONG! Was I drunk for that one?
- Patriots’ defense takes a huge step forward this year. Top 12. WRONG! 25th.
- Colts will be in the bottom 5 for defense this year. WRONG! So close, 7th from worst.
- Shockingly, the Colts will be in the top 20 for offense. CORRECT! I was Luck-y on that one. See what I did there? No? They drafted Luck...Andrew Luck...kid from Stanford...OK, I am moving on.
- Shockingly, the Jaguars will not. OK, well not shocking, just a fact. CORRECT! Good ole Jags.
- Jay Cutler will whine like a little baby at least once publicly and pout most of the rest of the year. CORRECT!
- Manning will do what Manning does, terrify his teammates into playing at a higher level and get the Broncos into the play-offs. CORRECT! Good ole Billboard Forehead was back.
- San Francisco will continue to have issues converting red zone visits into TDs, but their defense is Top 8 and they have the huge advantage of playing against the super-tandem of Skelton/Kolb. Kolb…ha! CORRECT! Going to count the whole thing as correct, even the red zone bit, because of the final drive of the Superbowl.
- Brees will account for around 90% of the Saints offense. Kinda...He was only 61%, but I made my point.
- Matching the intensity of the Browns, the St. Louis Rams will have a team in the National Football League. That is all that can be said. CORRECT! They made some noise, but never threatened greatness.
- Ravens will struggle on defense (there, I said it, they are old and terrible), but the offense will get them into the play-offs…where Flacco will go and Flacco the game away. Kinda...Their defense was not great...but Flacco's deal with devil proved it part wrong.
- Eagles will barely sneak into play-offs and get bounced in the first round. This will make it hard for them to do what they should have done 5 years ago, fire Reid, and indecision will reign supreme. WRONG! But at least the fat man is gone.
- Vick will continue to be the second most exciting player to be horrible (he should send Tebow a puppy to thank him) and will miss at least 2 games with injury. CORRECT!
- Cam Newton comes back to earth; his stats will regress, especially in the passing game. CORRECT!
- Kendell Wright will look great for the Titans in year 1. But Nate Washington will be the silent star of the team and leading receiver in terms of TDs. CORRECT! Nate tied with 4 TDs with several others, including Wright, and led the team with 746 yards.
- Eli Manning will look dopey, lost, and confused on the field. So, business as normal, they are play-off bound. WRONG! He did look dopey, but the thrust here was the play-off prediction, which was wrong.
- Offensive Player of the Year: Drew Brees; Defensive Player of Year: Jonathan Vilma…what’s that…suspended for the year? The whole season? Really, wow, what kind of ginger-haired nut bag would suspend a player for that long…OK, well then let’s pick Patrick Willis WRONG! Oh well, I am glad AD won it.
- Offensive Rookie of the Year: Andrew Luck; Defensive Rookie of the Year: Melvin Ingram (this one is for you Fanubo) WRONG! I would argue Luck probably deserved it, but so did Wilson.
- AFC Play-offs: Patriots, Broncos, Texans, Steelers, Ravens, Chargers Kinda...Four for six.
- NFC Play-offs: Packers, Giants, 49ers, Falcons, Eagles, Bears Ughhh...Three of six.
- Superbowl: Packers v Patriots (same pick as last year) WRONG! So very close, at least chose 2 play-off teams and one that made it to the Championship game.
- And, the most important event of the sports season…the 33rd Annual ProBowl Winner is…NFC!!!!!!! CORRECT! My most important prediction was dead on. The game we all watch this sport for, and it was 62-35. I ROCK!
As a recap, by my fairly non-scientific scoring method, I calculate my final score to be...
59.2%
So, roughly 60% correct, I can live with that. Check back next year!